Having his just is not for everybody. I have one, and I hate it. I love him, but I hated being a father. He was planned, but then when he was born, he just didn't like me, was never affectionate towards me. 6 months after he was born I got a vasectomy but never told my *ex(wife, who wanted (and now has) two more.
The only times I ever enjoyed being a father was when he visited me in Europe and we walked for hours without talking or making eye contact. Otherwise, our relationship has been just a disappointment.
Frankly, he's an asshole exactly like I am. At age 9 he told me he would be happier if I only came on his birthdays, so I did that.
Now he's 16 and I haven't seen him since Covid. Life is so much better. I would spend weeks dreaming the 4 hours of trains/taxis and 14 hours of flights to see him.
He gets spoiled like crazy, I've already put together a trust to pay for his college and buy him a house after he graduates, and I send his mother $3,000 per month.
In the end, I wasn't meant to be a father, only a sperm donor and an ATM.
Before he was born, I wanted children because my parents were dying and wanted grandchildren. Had I waited a year, my sister's twins would have fulfilled that bill and I would have been off the hook.
Since he stopped returning my texts, and I stopped sending them, I have found the most peace and happiness I have ever known. My career is finally back to where it was before he was born, I've lost 150lbs, I travel 3 months of the year, I've got a girl in many ports. I am living my best life now.
Maybe in his '20s he'll call me before I die, but if he doesn't that's his choice and I respect it.
The only times I ever enjoyed being a father was when he visited me in Europe and we walked for hours without talking or making eye contact. Otherwise, our relationship has been just a disappointment.
Frankly, he's an asshole exactly like I am. At age 9 he told me he would be happier if I only came on his birthdays, so I did that.
Now he's 16 and I haven't seen him since Covid. Life is so much better. I would spend weeks dreaming the 4 hours of trains/taxis and 14 hours of flights to see him.
He gets spoiled like crazy, I've already put together a trust to pay for his college and buy him a house after he graduates, and I send his mother $3,000 per month.
In the end, I wasn't meant to be a father, only a sperm donor and an ATM.
Before he was born, I wanted children because my parents were dying and wanted grandchildren. Had I waited a year, my sister's twins would have fulfilled that bill and I would have been off the hook.
Since he stopped returning my texts, and I stopped sending them, I have found the most peace and happiness I have ever known. My career is finally back to where it was before he was born, I've lost 150lbs, I travel 3 months of the year, I've got a girl in many ports. I am living my best life now.
Maybe in his '20s he'll call me before I die, but if he doesn't that's his choice and I respect it.